thinking about myself as a teacher!!

Here, in my bed while a horrible backache is killing me, I think about our role as a teacher in private schools. My doctor said that I am suffering this illness because I am stressful. And my boss said that my work is not enough good, it would be better. And my students told me that I have been the best teacher they have had. So my question is: who do I believe in? It is interesting how you are evaluated from different points of view and how those points of view affirm a "truth" about you.

What is the real teacher´s role?

When I was studying at the university my teachers told me that the best teacher is who gives the knowledge from the heart. I learned this conception and It became a big part on my life, Also they taught me that the best teacher is who is studying and working on getting better and ever day in my life i do it, but I can not understand why the private institutions have another idea about our role. you must to do many things: fill formats, clean the classrom, watch everything around you, listen to other people remaining silent and teach from your boss pedagogical vision which is from 60s and 70s.

I keep studying because I want to change those terrible ideas about education. It is impossible that we as teachers and our children be restricted and follow rules that make their teaching-learning process be a lost cause, because they and we, in those conditions, are not going to give the best effort and for that reason the students study for passing the exam and the teachers for earning the salary and nothing is changing. The education will be better if we make a stop in the way and think about these situations and try to improve them. The schools need new reforms and ways of looking at the world and to take the best of them, apply and observe carefully.

What is the education I dream? (I remember right now the words I listened the first day in my M.A. Program "the people who think that this programm is a dream have to consider that It will be a nightmare).

So I prefer to believe in dreams and consider that the things can change, why not? I dream with children who want to go to school because they love learning and nobody forces them to go. Kind-hearted teachers who teaches and learns at the same time. Open-minded teachers who believe every answer is important and consider those spaces of sharing with their students the best choice to observe, write, think, teach and learn from experience. Looking-forward teachers who do not have ideas about students without meeting them well, instead it, teacher who always give the students the chance to show the abilities and strenghs they have.

Is this impossible??